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The off topic/general conversation thread

Neverbloom

By Neverbloom
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marron

marron

Posted
Posted

its one of those dealio's where you get a bunch of woman meeting each other and i play the role of the furniture, i suppose the entire talking thing isnt too important as i will be gagged the entire time but that is why body language is so important

I hear being a pouffe is a great way to meet women!

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Neverbloom

Neverbloom

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Posted (edited)

 

its one of those dealio's where you get a bunch of woman meeting each other and i play the role of the furniture, i suppose the entire talking thing isnt too important as i will be gagged the entire time but that is why body language is so important

I hear being a pouffe is a great way to meet women!

 

personally i was hoping i would be a footstool or a chair

 

EDIT: just found out that is what a pouffe is

Edited by UncleGoat
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WhoDoWeSingFor

WhoDoWeSingFor

Posted
Posted

 

Goat, sorry mate I thought you were mucking around at first, obviously not, so I'll give you a better thought out response.

 

Try not to put too much pressure on yourself.

Remember, although you might be apprehensive and feeling like its a big deal (which is normal to feel that way), the truth is, it probably isn't.

 

These guys are just people too, hell, some of them might be anxious about being amongst strangers, you never know.

 

Tell yourself you're just out to have a nice time and if you meet some interesting people that's a bonus, if you just mingle a bit and have a night out then that's fine too.

 

A simple "Hi, how you doing" with a smile is plenty mate. you'll either strike up a convo or they'll just say "good thanks, yourself?" and move on.

No drama either way.

 

Another thing, although you may find yourself 'in their mind' a you said, they probably aren't doing the same.

 

What's the occasion Goat ?

I ask because if there's a specific reason for the night, it could help to focus on that ..... make it less about the whole 'meeting people' thing.

thank you for the help

 

its one of those dealio's where you get a bunch of woman meeting each other and i play the role of the furniture, i suppose the entire talking thing isnt too important as i will be gagged the entire time but that is why body language is so important

 

 

What you talkin bout Lewis ?  :shok:

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Neverbloom

Neverbloom

Posted
  • Author
Posted

 

 

Goat, sorry mate I thought you were mucking around at first, obviously not, so I'll give you a better thought out response.

 

Try not to put too much pressure on yourself.

Remember, although you might be apprehensive and feeling like its a big deal (which is normal to feel that way), the truth is, it probably isn't.

 

These guys are just people too, hell, some of them might be anxious about being amongst strangers, you never know.

 

Tell yourself you're just out to have a nice time and if you meet some interesting people that's a bonus, if you just mingle a bit and have a night out then that's fine too.

 

A simple "Hi, how you doing" with a smile is plenty mate. you'll either strike up a convo or they'll just say "good thanks, yourself?" and move on.

No drama either way.

 

Another thing, although you may find yourself 'in their mind' a you said, they probably aren't doing the same.

 

What's the occasion Goat ?

I ask because if there's a specific reason for the night, it could help to focus on that ..... make it less about the whole 'meeting people' thing.

thank you for the help

 

its one of those dealio's where you get a bunch of woman meeting each other and i play the role of the furniture, i suppose the entire talking thing isnt too important as i will be gagged the entire time but that is why body language is so important

 

 

What you talkin bout Lewis ?  :shok:

 

i am confused :P

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Neverbloom

Neverbloom

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Posted (edited)

Bro I can never tell when you are being serious or taking the piss.

lol a lot of people have that problem they just cant tell :P i am just going to a meeting where people talk to each other it goes from about 12 hours so its going to be very challenging for me

Edited by UncleGoat
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wendybr

wendybr

Posted
Posted

 

 

 

Goat, sorry mate I thought you were mucking around at first, obviously not, so I'll give you a better thought out response.

 

Try not to put too much pressure on yourself.

Remember, although you might be apprehensive and feeling like its a big deal (which is normal to feel that way), the truth is, it probably isn't.

 

These guys are just people too, hell, some of them might be anxious about being amongst strangers, you never know.

 

Tell yourself you're just out to have a nice time and if you meet some interesting people that's a bonus, if you just mingle a bit and have a night out then that's fine too.

 

A simple "Hi, how you doing" with a smile is plenty mate. you'll either strike up a convo or they'll just say "good thanks, yourself?" and move on.

No drama either way.

 

Another thing, although you may find yourself 'in their mind' a you said, they probably aren't doing the same.

 

What's the occasion Goat ?

I ask because if there's a specific reason for the night, it could help to focus on that ..... make it less about the whole 'meeting people' thing.

thank you for the help

 

its one of those dealio's where you get a bunch of woman meeting each other and i play the role of the furniture, i suppose the entire talking thing isnt too important as i will be gagged the entire time but that is why body language is so important

 

 

What you talkin bout Lewis ?  :shok:

 

i am confused :P

 

 

You're confused!?????    Me too????     :unknw:    Don't overthink things...just take situations as they come up...maybe???

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Neverbloom

Neverbloom

Posted
  • Author
Posted (edited)

 

 

 

 

Goat, sorry mate I thought you were mucking around at first, obviously not, so I'll give you a better thought out response.

 

Try not to put too much pressure on yourself.

Remember, although you might be apprehensive and feeling like its a big deal (which is normal to feel that way), the truth is, it probably isn't.

 

These guys are just people too, hell, some of them might be anxious about being amongst strangers, you never know.

 

Tell yourself you're just out to have a nice time and if you meet some interesting people that's a bonus, if you just mingle a bit and have a night out then that's fine too.

 

A simple "Hi, how you doing" with a smile is plenty mate. you'll either strike up a convo or they'll just say "good thanks, yourself?" and move on.

No drama either way.

 

Another thing, although you may find yourself 'in their mind' a you said, they probably aren't doing the same.

 

What's the occasion Goat ?

I ask because if there's a specific reason for the night, it could help to focus on that ..... make it less about the whole 'meeting people' thing.

thank you for the help

 

its one of those dealio's where you get a bunch of woman meeting each other and i play the role of the furniture, i suppose the entire talking thing isnt too important as i will be gagged the entire time but that is why body language is so important

 

 

What you talkin bout Lewis ?  :shok:

 

i am confused :P

 

 

You're confused!?????    Me too????     :unknw:    Don't overthink things...just take situations as they come up...maybe???

 

lol i am prone to over thinking pretty much everything so i will try to turn my mind off

 

I'm confused too..... a 12 hour meeting??? With a bunch of women???? Could be good, then again.....all I can visualize is Tupperware!!!! Aaaaagggghhhhhh nooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

all i can visualise is getting punched in the face when it comes to females :P

 

sincerely thank you for the advice people, i struggle at talking with people and that is something i need to fix

Edited by UncleGoat
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Carns

Carns

Posted
Posted

It's difficult to turn your brain off Goat, I struggle with that regularly. I over think and analyse many situations (for better or worse). I suffered (and still do, occasionally) from various forms of mild social anxiety. I would get really uncomfortable in situations I felt nervous, out of my control or out of place (or that people were judging me). The two things that helped me the most was recognising the triggers when I became anxious (and recognising that it was often irrational), and practicing talking to/getting to know people (we're not all instantly charming, dapper gents....................that takes work  ;) ).

 

Maybe you should focus your attention more on just getting to know one or two people. You shouldn't focus on the larger group, try and find one like minded individual. As others have stated, ask questions, the more you learn about somebody, the more you determine whether you're similar/have the same interests etc.

 

Don't make the entire event out to be either:

a) the be all and end all; or

b) the scariest thing in the world.

 

It's not.

 

It may not feel like it, but I can assure you, there are plenty of people who are just as nervous/shy as you are. And you may think you're boring (most of us think the same about ourselves), but we've chatted before (both on the forum and IRL), you've got a myriad of interests and topics of conversation that you can pursue. You're intelligent, polite, considerate and have a sense of humour (albeit a slightly odd one - which is a good thing, by the way). You're a person that other people will want to talk to, if you can turn the brain off for two minutes and just chat with them (easier said than done).

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Neverbloom

Neverbloom

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Posted (edited)

It's difficult to turn your brain off Goat, I struggle with that regularly. I over think and analyse many situations (for better or worse). I suffered (and still do, occasionally) from various forms of mild social anxiety. I would get really uncomfortable in situations I felt nervous, out of my control or out of place (or that people were judging me). The two things that helped me the most was recognising the triggers when I became anxious (and recognising that it was often irrational), and practicing talking to/getting to know people (we're not all instantly charming, dapper gents....................that takes work  ;) ).

 

Maybe you should focus your attention more on just getting to know one or two people. You shouldn't focus on the larger group, try and find one like minded individual. As others have stated, ask questions, the more you learn about somebody, the more you determine whether you're similar/have the same interests etc.

 

Don't make the entire event out to be either:

a) the be all and end all; or

b) the scariest thing in the world.

 

It's not.

 

It may not feel like it, but I can assure you, there are plenty of people who are just as nervous/shy as you are. And you may think you're boring (most of us think the same about ourselves), but we've chatted before (both on the forum and IRL), you've got a myriad of interests and topics of conversation that you can pursue. You're intelligent, polite, considerate and have a sense of humour (albeit a slightly odd one - which is a good thing, by the way). You're a person that other people will want to talk to, if you can turn the brain off for two minutes and just chat with them (easier said than done).

thank you very much, i plan on having a few drinks which help with the anxiety, not too much but a few help, the worst is when you cannot turn off your brain when your trying to sleep, hopefully a wanderers win(12-0) will help me relax too, i think exposure therapy is the best for me(yes i just said the word exposure i am tempted to go places with that but i'll be nice to everyone :P ) is best for me as in the more times i put myself in situations i hate(for example speaking in front of a group of people which i managed a few times because of the wanderers) then the easier it will eventually get.

 

i need to turn on the rational part of my brain to reconise that but apart from that my brain should be switched off, conversation is easier with no brain activity :P

 

i actually look at humans like animals at the zoo, i hope that doesnt sound insulting to anyone but i study them and try to understand their interactions, after doing that for years i still am no closer to understand anything :P its not so much humans themselves but how society expects people to behave and the social rules which i observe and thank you very much for the compliments, i love learning and seek knowledge but wouldnt say i am smart, i wish i was so i could be one of those evil insane scientists like this guy 

 

Rhino.jpg

 

well he is a doctor but still, i think being social is just something that comes naturally to some people but its more difficult for others and they just end up having to learn

 

thank you again

Edited by UncleGoat
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Neverbloom

Neverbloom

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One for you Goat. Just be confident and you'll be right.

 

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thank you, confidence is something i need to fake but it has been scientifically proven that if someone's football team wins(in my case the wanderers) they will feel more confident, so if i have any success and maybe make a new friend then the wanderers get credit, if it doesnt go well then its the wanderers fault :P

 

they say first impressions are very important, so i need an impressive way to get into the room, need to think of a create entrance like skydiving into the room or exploding something, would leave an impression

 

or blast my way into the building while riding a real dragon

Edited by UncleGoat
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Burgerman

Burgerman

Posted
Posted

Try "Lotus Lounge" on some friday nights is interesting or if you want shy dorky girls try sci-fi or comic conventions (nostalgia memories flooding back)

 

If you ask out 100 girls most will say no but eventually you might find a victim,but its hard these days finding decent chicks

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Neverbloom

Neverbloom

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Posted

Try "Lotus Lounge" on some friday nights is interesting or if you want shy dorky girls try sci-fi or comic conventions (nostalgia memories flooding back)

 

If you ask out 100 girls most will say no but eventually you might find a victim,but its hard these days finding decent chicks

lol while i wouldnt complain about getting a g/f its more about gaining friends and hoping for the best :P though i should go to a sci fi convention but mostly because i am nerdy myself :P (well really a casual nerd, i hate star trek)

 

its easy to find decent woman, but catching them is something else, they are easy to find but they also run really fast and are very difficult to catch

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Neverbloom

Neverbloom

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Posted

 

 

 

my new dog is slow

My dog doesn't have a nose......

noses are useful
You're supposed to reply " How does he smell?"

Then I answer with " Terrible!" Lol ,side splitting dad humour!!!

 

lol sorry i am a bit slow today myself :P though my new dog does need a massive bath

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