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JackDoff

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Everything posted by JackDoff

  1. My local drug dealer started dressing up as a Jehovah's Witness so he wouldn't arouse suspicion. He got arrested after the police saw people actually letting him in.
  2. Good old Phil... ” When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife”
  3. Died a week ago , only just found out RIP Marvin Hagler Hagler vs Hearns 1st round now THATS boxing
  4. Yeah I understand. I use them more as an acknowledgment
  5. Unfortunately yes. Cancer . She’d been fighting it for the last 3 years
  6. RIP Sabine Schmitz “Queen of the Nurburgring “ check out Top Gear with her driving a van around the ‘ring . Wish I could drive like her!
  7. My wife just left me. She says life revolves around football and she's sick of it. I'm quite upset. We were together for 7 seasons.
  8. RIP Murray Walker To me he was like the Martin Tyler of F1 .
  9. It’s the only one with the comfortable couch!
  10. I’m in the same room...that’s bad enough
  11. I think they’re all massive wankers. They’re all a bunch of classless morons , guys n girls
  12. Having to endure another brain draining season of MAFS FFS!
  13. Went to the local RSL for a 60’s 70’s 80’s night . They played “The Twist” so I twisted , they played “Jump” so I jumped around. They played “Come on Eileen “ and I got kicked out....
  14. Maybe he should write songs about monkey raised kids or lions or, whatever! instead of the dross he served up in his solo career!
  15. Hey! Just calling it as I see it!
  16. I didn’t mind them in the 80’s , but now....yeah, nah
  17. Man , this Karen/Ken/whatever on Reddit is triggered as! Can’t handle the fact I hate Phil Collins muzak! keeps calling me a Millennial! They think I’m about 40!
  18. Having fun on a Gen X sub Reddit about Phil Collins. All I wrote was “ Music that blows” boy am I getting hammered! Got called a “Millennial” ! and to “ have fun at life!” Love it!
  19. Love seeing the older cars at Bathurst!
  20. Amazing how a colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence For example: -Jane ate her friend's sandwich. -Jane ate her friend's colon.
  21. The judge asked the woman what she stole. She replied, “I stole a can of peaches.” The judge then asked, “how many peaches were in the can?” “Six,” replied the woman. After consideration, the judge decided to sentence her one night of prison for every peach she stole. Six nights total. At this moment the woman felt helpless, bawling her eyes out, she didn’t know what to do. And before the judge smacked the mallet down to make it final, her husband entered into the courtroom and yelled, “your honor, wait!”
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